This is one of those handy squeeze-handle contraptions that allows short people to reach things on high shelves, except it’s engineered with rubber surfaces to protect your clothing. This will be invaluable just for pulling on your underwear, if nothing else. And let’s talk about dropping stuff. It’s likely to happen a lot. Now how the hell are you gonna get to it if you’re not allowed to bend over for 6 weeks? Exactly. So you can either leave it there for 6 weeks (not so good if it’s a container of yogurt) hope your mate, a visitor or the local cat burglar takes pity on you — or get a Reacher.
The hospital will gladly send you home with one for a semi-reasonable fee. I found this 32″ long version for $6.83 at Sams Club